TALKING ABOUT IT

...how bad adults are created.

Hello dear friend 👋🏽,

My very sincere apologies for not writing to you in such a long while. Though words may not have flowed from my fingertips recently –you have been on my mind all the while and there's a lottt to write to you about. It's gonna be a long read today but I promise every second's gonna be worth it.

Today's discourse is one that hits very close home because I'm absolutely sure it has impacted you very significantly. It's PARENTING. Noo… YESSSSSSS, the ever-elusive elephant in the room that we often tiptoe around. Well, I like shaking tables and I know you like it too, so consider this our rebellion against the norm, our defiance against the silence surrounding crucial matters like this and I want both of us to normalize talking about issues like this because of how important they are. Shall we?

Parenting—it's a word that carries volumes of emotion, experience, expectation and memories, both the good and the bad. And whether we notice it or not, it's shaped each of us in lots of ways. From the gentle touch of a breastfeeding mother to the stern hand of discipline from the breadwinner, the impact of parental influence on society might just be unquantifiable.

Parenting is a flight that takes off long before each of us breathes our first and goes on shaping our paths long after we've grown into adulthood. Yet, despite its undeniable significance, we often overlook the profound impact that parenting has on our lives and the lives of those around us and this is why I have decided to talk about it with you.

Consider for a moment the individuals we encounter who genuinely battle with deep-seated insecurities and struggle so badly to interact normally with people either due to very poor social skills or a shocking lack of emotional intelligence & social awareness. And most of the time we tend to just conclude that there must be something fundamentally wrong with the individual's temperament or perhaps with the circumstance, but the reality is that the roots often trace back to the formative years of childhood.

Imagine a child raised in an environment where love, support, and affirmation are barely present—a child whose every action is met with criticism, ridicule, or indifference; a child who gets a slap instead of an answer to a genuine question; or a child who can never visit friends or be visited by them.

As they go through the hostile terrain of adolescence and adulthood, they carry with them the scars of their poor upbringing, manifesting in all sorts of ways, from a stark lack of self-confidence to unhealthy suspicions or insecurities about every person/thing to an inability to form meaningful connections with others and even up to not knowing how to respond to affectionate actions they receive from people.

This is but one example of how poor parenting can sow the seeds of discord in a person's life, stunting their growth and inhibiting their potential.
And this is what we see every single day; people who we can tell have a beautiful soul on the inside and could have turned out sooooo well, eventually ending up much worse than a shadow of themselves because of poor parenting and hostile family backgrounds.

And yet, within this miry clay of dysfunction, there is a glimmer of hope—a lily in the valley, a chance for us to make things right, to break free from the patterns of the past and forge a new path, writing the future with our own hands.

We have the CHOICE to be different, to do better than our parents did. We can choose to approach parenting with serious intentionality and godly fear, recognizing the immeasurable impact our words and actions have on the young hearts and minds the Creator will entrust to our care.

We have a duty to change the narrative, to create a world where every child is nurtured, loved and treated fairly, accepted with their uniqueness, and trained up to break the cycle of dysfunction and create a healthy society.

My dear friend, humanity’s progress hinges on the kind of seeds you and I sow into future in the form of kids. We either do better than our parents or in the next 50 years the world might just be… Well let's not be negative!!!

So, let us go aboard this ship together, with open hearts and determined spirits as we sail towards a time where every child has the opportunity to thrive.

Together we can MUST!!!

Can't wait to write to you again.

Your Friend, Goodness.